Love Begins With You

February often invites us to look outward for signs of love. We scan our relationships, hope for meaningful gestures, and measure connection by how seen we feel by others. Valentine’s Day, in particular, can heighten this focus, reinforcing the idea that love is something to be given or received. While love from partners and loved ones can be deeply nourishing, it cannot replace the steady, sustaining relationship we have with ourselves.

Self-love is not meant to compete with relational love. It is meant to support it. When our internal foundation is shaky, even the most caring relationships can feel insufficient. When that foundation is strong, love becomes something we share rather than something we seek to fill an emptiness.

Self-Love as Self-Respect

Self-love is often misunderstood as indulgence or self-centeredness. In reality, it is rooted in self-respect. It is the quiet, consistent way we speak to ourselves when no one is listening. It shows up in how we honor our limits, acknowledge our emotions, and allow ourselves to take up space without apology.

Self-love is not about doing more. It is about relating to ourselves differently. When self-respect is absent, people often push past exhaustion, dismiss their own needs, or tolerate situations that cause harm. When it is present, there is a sense of internal steadiness and trust that supports emotional well-being.

Self-Care Beyond the Buzzword

Self-care has become a popular phrase, yet its deeper meaning is often lost. True self-care is not only about occasional rest or indulgence. It is the ongoing practice of listening inward and responding with care.

Self-care includes resting when tired instead of pushing through. It includes setting boundaries without guilt and making space for emotions without rushing to fix them. These practices may feel unfamiliar, especially for those who have learned to prioritize productivity or caretaking. Yet self-care is not selfish. It is essential for emotional resilience and long-term health.

These are love notes I made for myself. Not affirmations meant to fix or bypass hard moments, but reminders meant to steady me when self-doubt gets loud.

Soul-Care and the Inner Relationship

While self-care often addresses the body and mind, soul-care speaks to something deeper. Soul-care is the practice of tending to meaning, values, and inner truth. It asks us to notice what feels nourishing rather than draining and aligned rather than obligatory.

Soul-care may include reflection, creativity, time in nature, or quiet moments of pause. It may also involve grief, longing, or uncertainty. Unlike quick fixes, soul-care invites patience and compassion. When soul-care is neglected, people often feel disconnected even when life appears full. When it is honored, there is a deeper sense of wholeness that does not depend on external validation.

The Power of Love Notes

One gentle way to practice self-love, self-care, and soul-care is through love notes written to yourself. Love notes are not about forced positivity. They are reminders of truth, compassion, and worth.

For many, self-affirmations feel uncomfortable at first. This discomfort often reflects long-standing patterns of self-criticism rather than evidence that kindness does not belong. Over time, offering ourselves honest and compassionate words can soften internal harshness and strengthen self-trust. These love notes become anchors, especially during moments of doubt or overwhelm.

Expanding the Meaning of Love

This Valentine’s Day, consider widening the definition of love. Alongside cards and flowers, make space for self-care, self-love, and soul-care. Love is not only something we receive from others. It is something we practice with ourselves, moment by moment.

For those who want to explore this practice more intentionally, registration is open for the Love Notes creative art workshop on February 14 from 10 a.m. to 12 p.m. This guided experience offers space for reflection, creative expression, and connection. Participants are invited to create personal love notes that serve as reminders of self-respect, compassion, and worth. Registration details are available here.